Billy: Come gather around kiddies, uncle Billy’s got a Christmas story for you:
Twas the night before Christmas when all through the rock star’s house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse
Her stockings were flung without a care
In hopes that the rock star soon would be there
Billy: She was nestled all snug in his bed
While visions of him danced in her head
Billy: Then he arrived home, came to the bedroom, turned the door knob...
Billy: Aw yeah, the best present of them all! Already unwrapped and in my bed.
Mark: Hey! Stop that right now! What kind of a Christmas story is that!? That’s utterly
disgusting. You ought to be ashamed of yourself!
Billy: What? Listen, "Twas The Night Before Christmas" was written in 1822, it’s time to
modernize it. People these days don’t dream about sugarplums. Heck, they don’t even know what they are.
Besides, I’m only placing in there what should have been in it all along. The
author neglected to include the part about the rock star gettin’ the girl.
Mark: You don’t modernize a classic like that! And there weren’t rock stars back then!
Billy: There should have been.
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