Interviewer: I’ve heard you gentlemen have quite a creative endeavor in the works. Care to
explain?
Elton: Billy and I are composing some music, writing songs together. So we decided to rent a
quaint little cottage in the country. That’s where we’re living and recording for the next three or
four months.
Interviewer: What’s it like rooming with Elton?
Billy: It’s really not bad at all. I do the cooking, he does the cleaning and we each do our own
laundry. Elton’s into flowers, so every morning he goes out to the garden and picks a nice
bouquet for the table. Although I do suggest that he checks those flowers more carefully for
bugs before bringing them inside. There were aphids on those roses you brought in this morning.
Elton: Aphids? I didn’t see any.
Billy: Well get some new glasses, ‘cause there were. Some of them jumped into my Lucky
Charms. Ew, there’s still one on my tongue. I know I ate several of them. I hope they have
some kind of nutritional value.
Elton: They do if you’re a lady bug.
Interviewer: Do you get into any arguments over space or privacy?
Billy: Nah, not really. Even though it’s a small house, I think we’re good about respecting each
other.
Elton: Mmmm....most of the time. But I’m still trying to figure out why when I came home the
other night, I found you asleep in my bed, wearing my tiara and curled up in forty pounds of
Skittles.
Billy: I thought it might stimulate my creativity. I’m stumped on this once piece I’m working
on and I need to come up with a transitory phrase.
Elton: Talk about tasting the rainbow. A nice Victorian bubble bath usually helps me.
Interviewer: So Elton has been the perfect roommate?
Billy: For the most part. Except I think he’s makin’ the moves on my girl.
Elton: I am not!
Billy: I come home and Elton and my girlfriend are sitting on the sofa with tea and crumpets and
laughing hysterically. I ask them what’s going on, and they say "nothing". Then I want to take
her out to dinner and she says "sorry honey but Elton and I have plans." He’s spent more time
with her the past month than I have. What do the two of you do?
Elton: She’s a brilliant young lady who fancies the same things I do. We’ve gone to art exhibits,
museums, gardens, and many other splendid places. Even went shopping and bought matching
outfits. She’s a wonderful companion.
Billy: Hey I took her to a garden last month and she didn’t like it.
Elton: Beer gardens don’t count.
Billy: Well what do you suggest I do then?
Elton: We’re going to the spa tomorrow. Getting the works. A massage, facial, manicure,
waxing, it’ll be great. You should join us.
Billy: No I’d rather sit on a toadstool and talk to the garden gnomes.
Elton: As you wish. But don’t come whining to me when we’re eighty and you look one
hundred because you didn’t get those honeysuckle cucumber facials like I did!
Billy: Bah!
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